Log Entry Earth Time November 02, 2014, 09:02.20 pm CEST
It is nearly unbelievable but we have really November now. We changed from summer time to winter time and it is dark so early. The warm weather prevents that more leaves are falling.
I had a look out of my bathroom window and could see stars, not many as we have some clouds there. It was warm today in the sun, around 15 °C, unusual for this time in the year when we sometimes have had the first snow. For me it is very welcomed, the warmth is better for my body.
Since Friday I take new medicine as one of my doctors told me I have fibromyalgia and he hopes this medicine will help me and relieve my pains. He can’t tell me if the fibromyalgia is the primary reason for my pain or if it is secondary as a result of an autoimmune disease. They can’t find the causal reason for this 😦
Unfortunately this new medicine makes me numb and sleepy and I can’t think clearly as usual. I need to be careful when I walk and on the staircase that I don’t miss a step. I can only hope that it will be better in the next days or I have to stop with this.
At the moment my body feels as if it is slowly breaking down, bit for bit, each day a bit more.
I know I need to be patient and in balance, that I have to trust my team. I still do and this is surprising me. I surrender and have no expectations anymore and I only hope that I can leave this year. It is a while now that I was told I would leave. I know they have to wait for the best moment to ‘catch’ me.
Please, my beloved team, not another winter! I am ready to go!
Kiba is still growing and behaves much better now. He doesn’t bite as much as he did some weeks ago and is nicer. He loves to be cuddled and licks the hand in return. The long leash and his daily reiki are creating miracles. I will continue to give it until his behavior is okay. He has some difficulties in letting go what he has in his mouth. He is still young, not yet five months and he will learn, I am sure.
Not long ago I had a healthy conversation with my close friend. She suspects the dark ones want us to lose faith and hope and to gain time for their dark plans, like the lawyer of my ex did with all the divorce and related stuff. Maybe they want again to destroy me or delay my leaving as they already did in the past. They fear my going home and having my full consciousness back. They know I could throw them the biggest stones into their way. They are afraid that I’ll have my power and abilities back. I could destroy them if I wanted to. But that is not my intention. I am sure they are bombarding me again with negative energies like they did two years ago. I am only glad that I am well protected by my team, by Saphira and my diamond shield.
I am not afraid of them anymore and they could only destroy my body, but then I would be in an instant at home and the powerful I AM that I AM. I am not afraid of death, it is only a changing of the dimensions.
I had to fight so often in my existence, in past lives and also in this incarnation. I am tired of fighting but if necessary I will fight again. And I will win as my love and my light is too strong for them. I know as even as a human I am stronger than Lucifer himself. He couldn’t win in our fights but I did. And I would win again because I am much stronger now than I was nearly three years ago. Now I know who and what I AM and this alone gives me strength and power.
I won’t lose hope and I stay calm, patient, in balance and I trust.
Maybe I will enjoy some vacation with SaLuSa as my friend suggested.
I love you all, infinite, without measure and in all eternity!
❤ ❤ ❤
I AM the IAM
I am the love, I am the light, I am the life
EnnKa Princess of Lyra, Limoria and Sirius
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